summer of '14

I know it's hard to make such sweeping statements about events so soon after they have occurred. I know that often perspective is absolutely necessary. However, I also know that the rawness of experiences and the emotions that come with them is valuable, and that time can dull them, or even erase them completely. 

I guess it's for this reason that I didn't hesitate to reflect on this summer. I've had one of the most valuable experiences of my life so far where I met people I could really, truly connect with, something that is rare for me and always a source of worry. I gained trust with some people, and began to distrust others, but ultimately learned that it's important to remember that people close to you always want to help. I am not a burden, and neither are you. 

Long days I spent in the sun, with the Earth, and realized that regardless of where exactly I belong, as cliche as it sounds, I will always feel the belonging I crave in nature, even though I forget this more often than I should. The more tanned I got, I liked to imagine myself as a transparent meter that fills up with liquid light, resting, charging myself for things that are to come. Preparing for when I need to pull from that light to help myself when I can't find light on the outside. 


Perhaps most importantly I relearned what it's like to be careless, even if it was only for a second. I kicked a bees nest and dashed away screaming, I went to bonfires on the beach, I rode a bike home under the stars so late that it was the early morning, and though I still feel lonely often, and probably always will, I've realized that these types of moments are good for my soul, and make me feel more connected and alive than anything. 

Summer isn't my favorite season, in fact I hate heat and dryness, but I can safely say that it is a time of rejuvenation, and I take and recognize that as something important, always.